family

Thoughts from a Therapist

            As a therapist who works with children and families, I don’t often see or treat victims of trafficking.  My work focuses mainly on a question that I feel is very important and occasionally overlooked in the push and passion of fighting the existing trafficking that occurs all over the world: “What are the ways to strengthen and empower families and children who may be at risk for trafficking?” 

             In my work, I see families who may have experienced abuse and trauma, sometimes throughout several generations of the family.  As a Marriage and Family Therapist, I am trained to see families as systems with interconnecting pieces, similar to the wheels and springs in a clock.  When I first meet a family who is engaging in treatment with a specific problem, my training prompts me to go deeper and ask questions about the family, exploring other areas of vulnerability which may either add to the existing problem, or create additional ones in the future.  I like to incorporate an important thought by Monica McGoldrick.  “Families comprise people who have shared history and an implied shared future.”  Her thought that families share not only the past, but also the present and the future no matter where each individual goes and what they do, informs the ways I work with families in therapy.  I think it is important to note that when I refer to ‘trauma’, I am referring to anything that could be considered scary or out of the normal for that family.  I am not referring to PTSD (although PTSD can be a part of a family’s challenge) as trauma does not need to become PTSD for it to create distress for a family or it’s individual members.

 

Some questions I ask and explore include:

•   What are some of the traumas the family has experienced in the past?

•   Things I usually ask about and try to be aware of: witnessing or experiencing domestic violence; a quick or unusual death in the family; sexual abuse (either in the current generation, or past generations); experiencing rape/birth of a child conceived by rape; abortion or early pregnancy loss; the death of a young child; messy and challenging divorce or separation (either current generation or past generations); perceived loss or betrayal of trust within the family (a family member marrying a disapproved of person or leaving the family religion).

•   What are some traumas that they are experiencing currently, whether as a family, or each family member individually?

•   Such as job loss, illness/chronic pain, car accidents          

•   How do past traumas influence the family’s functioning today? 

•   I especially look at trauma that has occurred in past generations and how ways of creating or maintaining relationships and attachments have been influenced by traumas.  For example, a family who has experienced rape in one generation, may hold differing beliefs about the value of sex and intimacy in relationships. 

•   How have past traumas created vulnerabilities in the family which may be, or have been, used by people outside the family system? 

•   I often look at how friends have interacted with the family.  Have those friends ever taken advantage of the family’s openness or generosity?  I look at the family’s relationships outside their family and explore the value of friendship and the role it can play in empowering the family and supporting the family’s recognition of healthy vs. unhealthy relationships. 

•   How do individuals in the family use past traumas to take advantage of other members in the family?

•   In many families I work with, abuse has occurred by a member of the family.  I often see this in the case of childhood sexual abuse. 

•   How can the traumas be used as protective factors and used to create narratives of positive self-worth and strength?

•   I strongly believe that bad things that have happened to people can be used to create strength and empower them.  I strive to support a family in therapy to identify the challenging events and situations they have been through and ways in which these events have supported them in becoming closer as a family and how those events can be rewritten to incorporate strength-based language.  For example, a family who has experienced a house fire could be supported to identify how the event, which is scary in itself, brought them closer together and how the neighborhood/church community stepped forward to help and support that family. 

•   What external people/agencies/organizations can interact with the family in a positive and strength-based way to bolster the family’s internal and external resources making them less vulnerable to exploitation?

•   Does the family have connections to a church or faith community?  Do individuals in the family have their own therapists?  Does the family receive other community supports?

 

            I believe that a large part of anti-trafficking work should be identifying possible risk factors and ways families have already been exploited or could be exploited, either as individuals or as a whole.  I also believe it is my job as a therapist to support the family in molding those risk factors and traumas into a positive and strength-based narrative.  A strength-based narrative can support them in minimizing and managing future traumas and reducing the vulnerability to be exploited internally and externally.  I firmly believe that although traumas can create vulnerabilities which others can take advantage of, those same vulnerabilities can be used to empower, strengthen, and protect the family.  Anti-trafficking work can often start within the family!

Natalie Glisson

Task Force Member

Marriage & Family Therapist

Riverbend Community Mental Health